Oueh

Truthfully the only part i am really looking forward to is my 2 months stint at french language school in south of france.

Rest is just fluff.

Haze

Blurs my sight. Comme la verite.

Comme vous l'avez dit. "Dragging feet, limitless leaps of faith".

Toi et moi.

"C'est quoi que nous faisons?" - vous vous demandez.

Aujourd'hui je me le demande. "C'est quoi que je fais avec toi?"

Why do i make the bed? Cause the room is small. Why do i clean the dishes? For the are not as numerous.

Why do i keep taking the leaps of faith?

Because someday i would get a great novel out of it. I am going in to see the end, which if life serves me right should be tragically poetic.

Lol, sure.

Vous dites que vous n'avez pas appris encore. To give you time. Que vous essayez. Oui, c'est quoi que vous dites! Do i trust you?

I wanted to know. Look where it got me.

I don't feel my heart.

Does it beat for you? How am i supposed to know if i don't feel it?

Ouvrez

Je regarde la port. J'entends pour le son familiare...d'une cle entrante le trou de serreur.

Il n'arrive jamais.

Avec le recul

Guess i was wrong. It wasn't that bad at all.

Rien de rien

Learning the song "non, je ne regrette rien"...we all need to perform something en français at our AF graduation.

Hmm. Nice choice of song, chère amie. Perhaps at the same time trying to convince yourself of the same? But what seems to be the problem this fine cloudy morning?

Non, rien de rien. Just a tiny change of plan. Nothing that demands any warrant. But i wonder why does life swerve just when you are carefree and unaware?

But you knew that it would, just the way it did, did you not, my hopeful friend?

Bien sûr, i did anticipate this last minute change, with my usual foresight. But i can be disappointed nevertheless, can't i? Why do some have it easier than the others? Things are always happening for them the way it is supposed to. Why was my first hand nothing but superbly unfair? I could have been a simple happy housewife, I could have been that. I think i would have been a great one too! Mais c’est payé, balayé, oublié...here i am instead, living a life i carved out of many a struggles and challenges... albeit a life many envy, and why not, j’ai allumé le feu, it's a life with accolades, independence and adventures. But did i ask for this?

A life full of questions and not many answers...aujourd'hui je commence avec toi.

Starting over... je repars à zéro...on a ground unfair, a battle unarmed. Mais je me fous de la malchance! I can rise above these petty questions life poses or unfair turns it takes. Ni le bien qu'on m'a fait, ni le mal, tout ça m'est bien égal!

Bonne chance donc, tu auras besoin de ça!

Around the world in 240 days

Working on some french compositions... they are rather overdue!

Also, need to finalize the far-east route of my tour du monde (that includes far-East Asia, Europe and Russia, North Africa and South America), as that's where this Phelias Fogg starts her journey come Jan1, 2011. Although on second thought i would rather be Passepartout, and let mr. jones deal with all the Fogg issues!

So far, it looks like a swirl of here to India-Thailand-Cambodia-Laos-China-Turkey-Greece-Egypt-Spain-Morocco-Italy-France-Belgium-Netherlands-Switzerland-Czech republic-Romania-Russia-London-Ireland-Chile-Peru-Les Antilles and back home completing the loop. Of course France will claim lion's share of this time as we will be stationed in south of France studying french and being like the locals (ooh, j'espere!)

Hey missy, get back to your composition!

Stopping by

My, the year is drawing to a close already! Passed me by so quickly that i barely got a chance at collating the takes here. Oh, well...

It rained today.

Last night it were just drizzles. Mr jones and i went to the aquatic park and looked at boats, ferries and ships, abandoned jailhouses, pretty towers and outnumbered swimmers. Someday i will swim there, i promise, with or without a wetsuit! That reminds me, that mischevious brat mr. jones tricked me into going into the store Patagonia en route to the park, hmph! But it was almost a perfect evening, i shall say! Intermixed with some killer chicken that i made and the film "requiem for a dream", and then something something! Oops, my lips are sealed...:-p

But i digress.

It was a hectic year. So i am proud to say that i did find time to do quite a bit of reading, starting with "The glass palace" (Informative), followed by "The picture of Dorian Gray" (Loved it!), "The fountainhead" (hmm! the hmm prolongs, i will let you know when it ends), "Sea of poppies" (Intriguing), "The metamorphosis" (Though-provoking), "Freedom at midnight" (Informative and an interesting take), "Sons and lovers" (#rated 1 so far just cause!), along with some other short stories by DHL. Currently it is "The brothers Karamazov" that i am on...recommended by mr. jones. Hmm, i realize that we do it a lot, read books suggested/read by the other, perhaps just so we can have a tumultuous debate, hehe.

Oh darn, look how long this post took me away from my first first draft (of my sabbatical research paper)! Off i go then, au revoir, sois-sage!

Comme il a dit

Patience, my dear Watson.

Un souffle en l'air

I have a favourite painting. A reprint of Claude Monet's "Les meules a Giverny". It used to sit on my mantel quietly reminding me the unpredictabilities of life.

It sits in the storage now with all my other stuff, veiled to tackle dust. And here i sit in my own storage listening to the sombre tick-tock of clocks and pronounced click-clack of spiderman's solar dance, as i gather my fallen leaves forgetting that i am in the path of the mighty wind...

puff and i am gone!

Yesterday, i was happy in my own skin. Did you not see? Then came the gusty wind as it always does i don't know from where, tearing through my being.

Rain washes me out, but there are always debris. So i gather myself again and go about my task...

To all non-believers

they say, 'ah, you met online?'
i say, 'aye, we met online.'

inside a box on an lcd screen
yes, it was a friday night.
but nay, there was no sight

no sight, no sound, no touch
no taste no smell, nay, no such
but two minds stripped off of all senses

they say, 'my, what a quandary!'
i say, 'ah, 'twas but a rendezvous without a boundary.'

La magie, c'est seulement la leur, qui croient en lui.

Adding on

All you need to cancel a plus is an equal minus.

Whoa!

That was a goal, a mon avis!

I am quite liking this Valdez...

If anyone can score for Paraguay, it would be him.

And oh, shame on you, Spain rank2.

Deutschland! :-*

Watched the game avec ma mere while having breakfast. A rare happening. I daresay it was the best mother-daughter bonding we ever had. She even made various funny comments including the one when she winced at the 4-0 scoreboard saying it looked oddly unbalanced.

:-p

Off to a nap before the next game.

I would like Paraguay to beat Spain.

After all, it's the WORLD cup!

Sigh

Loitering...

On the last surfing spree i found that i scored 95% in the french course a la ordinatoire that i abhorred.

Now that should make me happy. I beat the godforsaken computer. yay. pat-pat. Whatever!

I need to be sleepy. Perhaps a glass of milk?

Get off of my mind, you who has been ruining my nights, stop torturing me!!!

Please.

Donc

Everyone's asleep. Pas moi. Twoface stole my sleep. Three nights in a row.

Ce n'est pas juste. Tonight was clearly out of line. Et quelle facon lache! (ah fuck this stupid keyboard, les accents ne marchent pas ici!)

Say, why take it then?

"Don't let me give you any less than you give me"...une parole vide, non?

Running out of iterations. Just when i am near convergence there is noise.

I am angry. I wish the noise would drown, convergence or not.

Good, old buddy, you said it at last! Mieux tard que jamais!

Truncate?

Yes. Truncate, truncate, truncate! Not worth your time.

No, not worth my time. Not the noise.

But what about the music? It is beautiful.

Yes, i admit. Well, while it lasts.

What then? Tell me which way to go.

(half-smile, half-snicker) Drop it, old gal. Il n'apprendra jamais. But i wonder, will you either?

Le cerf-volant

I would like to say a few words. But what can i really say in the next five minutes that i have?

Sometimes i see no point in prolonging life. Like yesterday. I wanted to be done with this life.

I now have almost all i could have asked for. Nevertheless, i am restless again. That makes me question the worth of it all.

Hold me down, thread, only if you can. For the wind is strong.

1 Mai

Malheureuse.

Je me suis perdue et fatiguee. En outre, les accents ne marche pas sur mon ordinatoire. Je me sens sans pouvoir. Et toute vide.

Pourquoi?

A wise friend once said..."we live in a state of confusion...it's a guy thing...we tend to think on a level plane (point a -point b - point c) and when we have to think laterally it has the same effect as dropping a toaster in a bathtub..."

Well said my friend, what would i know, when it comes to reading the minds of the opposite gender, i am about as clueless as us gals come!

Crazy heart

Three weeks ago...

One afternoon i was taking a leisurely stroll and happily discovering the quaint and tres cher shops in my neighborhood (including a William and Sonoma, ok that's not quaint but i was happy to find it!) when i started feeling pretty winded. This lasted the whole next day so i reluctantly called my medical provider for an appointment. As i explained my symptoms on the phone they asked me to call an ambulance promptly ...to which i said, excuse me, but why on earth? All i wanted was a general assurance that i was good to go on my upcoming 10 day vacation avec mon petit ami, :-D, er, not a visit to a blasted hospital! My ticket was all booked, calendar cleared, clothes packed, ok, maybe not the last one, lol who am i kidding...but you get the idea!

Anywho, to cut the story shorter, i spent the next one and a half day in the hospital despite my wish, where i was poked and probed, kept up all night by multiple people checking on vitals at every hours, lost 15 tiny bottles of blood (well, it matters to me! i am very partcular about my blood!) and was handed the conclusion that i have a rather naughty heart that was sending out all kind of crazy signals on the EKG and stress test. "Oh well", said i, "when can i go home, i have a flight to catch". This statement of mine upset mini me very much (on top of the positive results of the tests) and the doc and her conspired to keep me until they exhausted all tests. So i missed my flight, pretty much starved the whole next day, went in many scanning machines and out, but finally proved my heart clear of imminent danger.

The next day i got on a plane.

Mmm...the next week was beautiful...

I can describe, but i would rather smile...and hum a tune...

...i know it's whimsical on my part
but this is how i feel sometimes
as if you were created just for me
my darling love...

So what if my heart is beating odd, i have beaten odds before...

:-p

That reminds me, guess which professor was awarded a full year of sabbatical leave (in a dry year like this at that!)? C'est moi! hehe, soon i will be taking off to mr. jones' city and then... France...

And then, oh i dunno...

:-)

Wish me luck.

Le mien

It was the day before yesterday.

Standing behind him, she was observing his hands.

Held in front of him was her airless bike, upside down, as he was trying to find the right location in the spoke to reset the air valve. But all she could see were those hands, going in circles along the flat tire...once, twice, thrice...searching, moving its airless body to adapt to the right position...the musty smell of the bike garage, the sound of the elevators, now clunking up, then down and then clunking up again...the blue-steel watch snug against his busy wrist, the creases in her favorite shirt, created by his slightly bent posture...

Click. Why, he found it.

Air being pumped in ...rhythm in motion, changing, adapting to the space within...finding, filling, to the point when it can fill no more...

...she couldn't see his face.

Just the motion of his hands.

And then with one strong and swift jolt he turns the bike up on its stand. It stands proudly, chained to its slot, its round rubber legs now alive with air.

But hers have turned limp.

What can i say, sure as hell i still am, drunk on you, mon petit roi.